Tweetings From 3000 Feet
The main reason I got an iPhone—aside from the fact that my previous RAZR phone had reception equal to that of a 1960′s short-wave radio (“Come-in Tokyo!”)—was so I could keep connected to the internet and my billions of fans no matter where I was or what I was doing.
So, on Monday, I decided to take it up in a hot air balloon. Normally, I don’t fly much, but when there are too many people for the mid-sized balloon but not really enough for the big balloon, the pilot likes to have some extra weight in the basket for maneuverability, so one of the crew guys will jump in.
Usually, it’s Roeland, because he’s training to get his pilots’ license and needs all the flight-time he can get. But, it was a nice day and I thought it might be fun to try twittering while I was up there.
Although most of my tweets were of the simple “Hello from 2,500 feet!” variety, I did get creative enough to take a self-portrait and upload it for all the world to see (or, at least all of my 8,000 Twitter followers). What I didn’t realize, though, was that the photo I uploaded didn’t really capture the essence of my charm like I thought it did when I viewed it on my iPhone in bright sunlight while not wearing glasses.
Nope. In this particular photo I looked like a liquor store panhandler.
Could you imagine?: You get into a hot air balloon to go for a ride and after you’re way above the ground—high enough so that if you jumped out and hit the ground it would look more like a Rorschach Test than a dead body—a stinky, unshaven, yet surprisingly handsome panhandler reaches out his hand and says, “gimmie a quarter!”
Trapped at 3,000 feet with a panhandler. That would suck.
Anyway, the photo in which I’m referring is NOT the one you see at the top of this page; although, it was taken within seconds of the other one which, believe-it-or-not, is much worse. If you really want to see it, I’m sure you can find it in my twitter feed somewhere.
Dead Rooster is the online home of 
I’m fairly certain that if I went up in a hot-air balloon, I would cry and whine until someone threw me over the edge. Come to think of it, someone would probably do that, anyway. So no balloon for me.
Cheers,
Brian
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William McCamment
reply on November 16th, 2009 6:14 am:
No need to cry in a balloon, there’s no turbulence and it’s basically the same as standing on the floor. In fact, I sometimes tell people that if they get nervous to just close their eyes and they won’t even know they’re moving.
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“The main reason I got an iPhone—aside from the fact that my previous RAZR phone had reception equal to that of a 1960’s short-wave radio…
The main reason I got iPhone is a big poster in Paris center in 2008, summer. I thought: GREAT!! I want it and buy. I like my iPhone and Apple PC. fashionable )
great pic )
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William McCamment
reply on November 17th, 2009 7:11 am:
I wonder how I got along without one!
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Wow, what a view from up there. I’m really jealous because I would love to experience that but I can’t because I’m afraid of heights like you wouldn’t believe. Must be a one of a kind experience being up there.
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William McCamment
reply on November 20th, 2009 5:09 am:
You should try it. If you get nervous, just close your eyes, it’s like standing on the ground. There’s no sense of motion. Everyone’s got to do it at least once.
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hatingtherain
reply on December 1st, 2009 4:38 pm:
not me!
you’ll never get me up in your evil balloon!
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hatingtherain
reply on January 28th, 2010 12:53 am:
…except maybe the mile-high flight, that’s something I’d consider. As long as you’re piloting
That’s a great photo of you. I can’t believe the Twitter one is so terrible– we’re our own worst critics. I’ll go look at it now. Be right back.
Oh my God. You were right. Hideous. I can hardly keep my breakfast down.
Seriously, though: how can you use the virtual keyboard? I returned my iPhone. It was as if my fingers had become huge sausages that just flopped on the keys.
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William McCamment
reply on January 28th, 2010 6:42 am:
I love the virtual keyboard! My fingers are too big for those tiny Barbie keyboards.
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So how exactly do they navigate those balloons once they take off? Living near the coast line, once the balloon starts to gravitate upwards I’d be afraid of sailing around the world in the jet streams!
Can you navigate those just like riding a bike? Turn it in the direction you want to go and then hit the gas?! I see them around where we live from time to time, they look like fun.
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William McCamment
reply on February 11th, 2010 5:01 am:
You can only control the balloon in an up-and-down direction; however, at different levels the wind is generally going in different directions. So, what you have to do is find the layer of wind that’s going in the direction you want to go. That’s how you steer a balloon.
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