OK, let’s all just simmer down a little — this is Bobby Slayton we’re talking about here… if you were so easily offended, you shouldn’t have watched his hilarious 1-hour comedy special premiering this week on Showtime® (Premieres March 4th, 9/8c).
If you like, vicious, “Pit-Bull of Comedy” style stand-up routines, this Scarsdale, New York native will yank out your funny bone and crush your skull with it. He’s rude, crude and not afraid to burn every sniveling morsel of political correctness in his wake.
If all that didn’t chase you away, I have one last word of warning: the guy is hilarious. There’s a reason why he appears on Comedy Central’s 100 Greatest Stand-Ups of All Time. He’s side-splitting funny and, while watching this special, you should seriously consider having an oxygen tank nearby to revive your uncontrollable laughter.
Here’s a taste of what you’ll see on March 4th:
Thanks for the laughs, Bobby! See you on Showtime® March 4th. And, thanks for doing the following special video “shout-out” for Dead Rooster; it really means a lot to me. You’re the greatest!
I rarely put videos on my blog, but when I saw this Walmart Clown Commercial during the NFL playoffs yesterday, I laughed so hard I knew I had to share it.
It is easily the funniest commercial I’ve seen in years and it boggles my mind as to why Walmart didn’t wait a couple weeks to feature it during the Superbowl. What a bunch of clowns! I’m sure it would have been one of the winners.
Death Metal Rooster Bonus
This next one isn’t nearly as funny as the Walmart Clown Commercial, but I think it is related and relevant enough (given the “rooster” theme of this blog) to earn a spot on this post. Thanks to my friend John Sullivan at the Best Blog in the Universe for turning me on to it.
Screaming clowns and screaming roosters… I hope you’ve had your coffee!
In 1982 Arthur C. Clarke published a novel called, 2010: Odyssey Two which was made into a film in 1984 with the shortened title 2010 which was a sequel to his 1968 novel 2001: A Space Odyssey which was really just a novelization of the Stanley Kubric film predictably called 2001: A Space Odyssey which — I know this is getting confusing — was based on Clarke’s short story The Sentinel.
I remember seeing 2010 at the movie theater in 1984, seeing the awesome space-oriented special effects, and thinking how awesome it’s going to be when 2010 finally gets here. But, the tag-line of the movie was: the year we make contact which, after seeing other movies such as Signs and Pitch Black make me wonder if we really want to be here barricading our farm house and waiting for the aliens to swoop down and suck-out our insides.
1984 was also the year I bought a Hewlett-Packard 11c calculator with RPN (Reverse Polish Notation). I’m guessing most of you have no idea what this calculator is and why I should be making such a big deal about it, but I’m also willing to predict that those of you that actually own one have never upgraded and are still using it to this day.
How can I make such a claim? Because, not only is the HP 11c the greatest calculator ever invented, but once you get used to it you are completely ruined when it comes to operating other calculators!
I’m not going to bore you with the details as to why this is such a great calculator because you will most likely have the same reaction as hatingtherain did on the phone yesterday: “I don’t want to hear about it!” which was quickly followed by her calling me a “geek” and asking me what color pocket-protector she should buy me for my birthday.
See how she loves me? 🙂
The sad thing is that my 11c is beginning to show signs of wear and Hewlett-Packard stopped making them more than 10-years ago. You can periodically find them on eBay for $200-$300 but usually they are in worse shape than the one I’ve already got.
Which is why I am so glad I live in 2010. Yesterday, after fiddling around in the app store on my iPhone, I discovered they have an application. Yes, someone created an exact duplicate and I can now have a fully functional HP 11c calculator with me at all times wherever I go!
When will the future get here? Trust me, the future is now.
Last night I woke up to the phone ringing. It was 11:30 p.m. and I was out cold. I’m always nervous about answering the phone at that hour because everyone knows I get up really early (3:00 or 4:00 am) to go ballooning and it could only either be an emergency, or the occaisional call from Costa Rica from someone wanting to know if I want to place a bet (I have no idea why they call me, I don’t gamble and have no intention of EVER placing a bet by telephone — especially to some random casino in a foreign country).
I answer the phone and the voice on the other end sounded very juiced-up — almost out of breath with excitement. I’m still waking up and not fully registering the words, but the tone and urgency in the voice starts my heart racing. Finally, I’m able to put the words together:
“Hey! I’m watching The Wizard of Oz… with Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon as a soundtrack… It’s GREAT!”
It was my buddy Bret. A few weeks ago I told him about turning the sound off while watching The Wizard of Oz and playing Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon album as a soundtrack. If you start the Dark Side of the Moon album right after the 3rd roar of the MGM lion at the beginning of The Wizard of Oz it is uncanny how well the music goes with it.
Of course, it helps if you’ve seen The Wizard of Oz a few times and know what’s going on during the scenes without the help of the dialog. It also helps to be a fan of Dark Side of the Moon. Otherwise, you might not fully appreciate the multitude of coincidences.
For instance, if you don’t know that Dorothy is running away from home, you won’t think it’s interesting when the lyrics say, “run… rabbit run…” or when Professor Marvel reads her fortune and tells her she needs to go home, it won’t be as interesting when the lyrics say, “home… home again…”
One of my favorite parts is when the scarecrow is dancing around like a lunatic and the lyrics are saying, “the lunatic is on the grass…” And what song title would be a more appropriate soundtrack during the scarecrow scene than Brain Damage. LOL
But, I digress…
After I realized the phone call was not an emergency, I relaxed a little bit and, to tell you the truth, can only recall portions of the conversation. I guess I nodded off a couple of times during the dialog.
I do remember him telling me about some incredible automatons from the late 1800’s that were featured in a YouTube video or something.
Anyway, the reason I’m telling you all this is because after I hung up the phone I immediately fell back asleep and had one of the most bizarre dreams I’ve ever had:
I was a robotic scarecrow chasing people through a corn field. And, yes, I could breathe fire.
The most disturbing part, though, was that I actually enjoyed being a fire-breathing mechanical scarecrow.