End of the Line for Lewis and Clark
I recently stood on the very spot where, in 1806, Lewis and Clark, after an historical 2-year expedition to reach the pacific ocean, looked at each other and said, “we came all this way for this?”
I’m sure an accurate history of the Lewis and Clark expedition is fascinating, but I am much too lazy to do any sort of actual research, so I’ll have to rely on what I remember from my fifth-grade history class and my recent trip to Seaside, Oregon.
Legend has it that during an historical August day in 1803, Zeek “Meriwether” Lewis and William “Crazy Legs” Clark, having realized Honus Wagner was not yet invented and it would be exactly 100-years before the first World Series, decided there was nothing better to do than take an historical hike to the Pacific Ocean.
Unfortunately, they were in Pittsburgh—WAY closer to the Atlantic than the Pacific. But, if there’s one thing William Clark knew about Meriwether Lewis, it’s that if he doesn’t get his way, he’ll likely throw a colossal temper tantrum, holding his breath until he turns an historical shade of turquoise.
So off they went skipping in historical fashion toward the Pacific Ocean.
After about 3 hours they noticed they had been skipping in circles, so they enlisted the services of an historical Native American woman named Sacagawea to serve as guide and interpreter. She (Sacagawea) strapped her infant son—who’s name I’m not making up—(Jean Baptiste Charbonneau) onto her back and led them (Lewis and Clark) out of the city and into the scary, but historical wilderness.
After a grueling 2-years of battling wind, rain, sleet, snow, banditos, leaky canoes, werewolves, salesman and many varieties of historical vegetation, they finally arrived at Seaside, Oregon where they were historically dipped in bronze to forever watch the seagulls poop into the briny sea.
More than 200 years later (in fact, just last week) I was led around Seaside by my girlfriend Gloria—who, as luck would have it, is 50% Native American AND a Native Oregonian—where we visited an historic-looking Mexican restaurant.
I boldly, and historically ordered a Beef Chimichanga.
Historical evidence:
Dead Rooster is the online home of 
Nice, never knew about this. But I do now
. Thanks.
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William McCamment
reply on September 16th, 2009 6:33 pm:
Um… you might want to verify the accuracy of several statements appearing in this piece.
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Glad your out there Living the LIFE
now we know where you were
Blogger Bill stumble you he said ?
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William McCamment
reply on September 17th, 2009 5:49 am:
Haha! Thanks John!
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What no burritos? (Here I am, you trackin’ me?)
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William McCamment
reply on September 17th, 2009 4:02 pm:
Technically, a chimichanga is a deep-fried burrito.
Yes, I believe you are the one from Gatineau, Canada. Right?
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Good thing she (girlfriend) didn’t know the real ending or you would be standing there in dipped in bronze
I didn’t pay much attention when I was in school and have very few memories but I do remember the adventures of Lewis and Clark. Probably because it was an adventure story and that’s all I daydreamed about, that is, until I realized the seventies was full of halter tops and mini skirts
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William McCamment
reply on September 20th, 2009 7:02 pm:
I don’t remember the real ending. It didn’t involve werewolves, did it?
Of course you know that when I was writing the above post, I was imagining Sacagawea in a halter top and mini skirt.
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Still up to your shenanigans I see. Sacajawea in a halter top? She never wore a bra. She would hang under the halter top. Will you ask Gloria if I can still worship you from afar? I swear I am safe. Still loving you, the Princess. (Now you’ll have to explain that one won’t ya?)
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hatingtherain
reply on September 22nd, 2009 11:29 am:
You can worship him from afar, and even take the title of Princess, as long as you acknowledge me as Queen
(I realize now I need as much help as I can get to keep him in line!)
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William McCamment
reply on September 24th, 2009 9:01 am:
Ladies! Please! There’s enough Dead Rooster for ALL the chicks!
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I never knew history could be this much fun. I drink beer a lot, but I never knew I was making history. Gosh, I wish had thought to take pictures. Maybe I’ll bronze a beer bottle next time. Or do I have to be in Oregon to qualify for bronzing?
Nice Chimichanga! And a very entertaining history lesson. My best to Crazy Legs.
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I also want chicks.
my gf always asks me to have a date but i dont have time to do it
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Sacagawea wasn’t just a mascot, but a kind of superwoman. Among her more amazing exploits, she once jumped into a white water part of a river when several canoes had dislodged with incredibly vital supplies, rifles and documents. While the guys were kind of mincing up and down the river bank wishing, she single-handedly prevented the canoes from being lost.
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Aha!! nice historical story. Hello Gloria
! do you like Beef Chimichanga and beer? I would like to taste this both , especially DOS Equis LOL!!
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I actually thought it was about superman.
Nice walk through history. I love Chimichanga!
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I love chimichanga’s but i prefer chicken. I’m not a regular beer drinker, but when I do have it I like to have a fanchop; an orange fanta with beer. It is crazy delicious (a cuban drink but goes great with the meal).
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Great little history lesson. Thanks for sharing. Now I’m craving Mexican food.
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Love Dos Equis too, especially with spicy salsa and chips. Nice little story and blog. =)
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I love Mexican food and I bet you enjoyed your dinner with your girlfriend since you will able to witness the historical commemoration of Lewis and Clark.
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